a million and nothing

A million thoughts
A thousand images

that normally cloud the mind

and now

just one thought
one image

Him

and without him

emptiness


16/07/2013 ~Esme

My ghost

My Ghost haunts me
Hovers in the background
unseen
unherd
Ever present

My ghost follows me
Penetrates my thoughts
Fears
Feelings
And reminds me to breathe

My ghost haunts me
lifting the weight from my back
holding
helping
before retreating once more

He is my ghost
Whish that he were a poltergeist
or alive
And mine

My ghost

July 15 2013

Send me the Thorns

Screw the roses and send me the thorns.
They are beautiful too.
Make the rain come today,
ill walk to the sun with you.
Beat me down with your love.
And catch me where I fall.

Esme - a work in progress June 2013

I close my eyes

I close my eyes
And think of England

I close my eyes and listen to the moans escaping my lips
I feel my hips lifting, reaching for you

As I close my eyes and think of England

I close my eyes and focus on my nerves sparking, causing uncontrolled convulsions through my form

And I close my eyes and forget about England

I close my eyes and listen to your steps, your controlled breathing and floorboards unwanted squall

And I close my eyes and pray for England

I close my eyes to keep myself guessing, so each touch and movement will suprise, and curse my inability to not try to peek

I close my eyes and wonder at England.

I close my eyes for just a second, before the limit is reached my head thrown back my eyes flung open

I open my eyes, for you are my England

~Esme April 1st 2013. Eddited June 30th
 A change from my normal style it's a bit corny I know but we all have our moments ;)

Spark

That spark
The pause before impact
The knowledge
The inevitable surprise
The following release
The release
And the building up again



(Esme 24th Jan 2013)

generation

generation sex
what might happen next
everything means so much more
a wink, a kiss, or front door
multy layerd conversations
confusing all for generations

25/11/2012

rapsody

Oh sweet torture you push me to the edge!
pulling me while I too pull away,
as you move closer, I do near the ledge!
The words inside are just stuck on replay.

Building up temptation, with thoughts yet to be pure
the struggle deep inside my, poor held, head.
watching all your writings, as near to me you draw
and my held heart is wanting to be lead.


 
Tue 21st feb 2011(21/02/2012

loves slender knife / a lovers sigh

I sit and cry
for why?
"Goodbye"

I lie (down) and cry.
I hate,
"Goodbye"

once more I sigh
'till next
"Goodbye"

I wait,
on the morrow's
"Hello"




Esme ~ 28th October 2012

smilingly into the night

You're better than chocolate
sweeter than sweets
taste better than any food
you're my hearts own treat

you're who i want to see
you're not my wrong but right
with you ill always go
smilingly into the night



Esme ~ Written During 2012 somewhere before august. precise date lost

Fragmented is my reality

I'm broke but dont fix me
this is who i am
it is my reality




rebuild to break again
stronger left alone
a piece of stronger stone


chip off the sides
take true form
center nolonger hides


the walls are broken
now see within
dont try and grow dead skin



~Esme~
Wed 26th septemer 2012 adapted from a song i once wrote

one, two, three

I've seen you say it
in black and white

I've seen you say it
in pictures moving light

feeling is believeing

I've herd you say it
in your heart beat quickening

I've herd you say it
in your breathing, thickening

seeing is believing

I've felt you say it
in the grip of your arms

I've felt you say it
in the depth of your lips

Hearing is believing



30/09/2012 7:30pm

if you lead them, they will follow

Write them first
asign them later
the words come tumbling down

write them first
asign them later
throw them on the mound

write them first
asain them later
till scattering them around

Tidal

It rises
swelling beneath the cavety
resisting centred gravity

it pushs up, and booms and grows
against all odds, opend and rose

bashing against the cage, where its set
pushing against pain,swallowed what it met

growing harder and faster,defying all rules
encompasing, destroying, reducing all fools

exploding out, and washing away
till nothing is left, but growth and decay.

The Ghost inside

My name is not my own;
it does not fit,
It is not me.

My Body is not my own;
The shape is wrong,
I am not me.

My thoughts are not my own;
if they cannot be voiced,
the voice is not mine.

I am not my own;
I cannot change,
I cant be me.

My name is not my own,
Why is yours?

Esme~
7/5/2012

Glacier

Frozen in place
an Idea
a Thought
dragging and pulling hope down
Sparks melt the ice
A Flicker
an Idea
Toying Emotion arround

31/3/2012

Floating Thoughts

Is safety truly of value?
when it holds back freedom
and gives extra worry and care.

How can the happiness
so constantly saught,
only so briefly be there?

Contact and touch
so often portray,
Much less than
their absence provides.

Further we move
and the more we invest
more joy and despair
collide

31/3/2012

I won

I won because i trained the ability
I lost because you needed the win

Esme
23/2/2012

I have been Condemmed

I have been condemned
I may do what I wish
say what I like
make my own mistakes
and learn from them


I have been sentenced to life
to life as I choose
to go where I will
and to regret where I wouldn't

I have been punished
with conscience for my actions
a mind that over thinks
and a heart with the capacity for love 

and so I am condemned,
condemned to be Free.






Inspired by a bloggers chosen name "condemed to be free"
Esme 17th may 2012

In my mind /limitles boundries

In my mind
the scene is set.
in my mind
the detail met.
in my mind
the picture flows.
in my mind
the idea grows.
in my mind
i move and grow.

but through my hand
i fail
to show
16/5/2012

I see you

I see you in nature,
in the fluttering of the leaves
I hear you in gales howling,
feel touch in morning breeze.
I smell you in the flower,
in the soft, rich growing earth.
I see your wisdom showing,
with the growth of each new bud

where ever I see beauty,
see my loves or indeed yours
I float though the connection
into memory's open doors.




Esme ~
Written 10/3/2012 In memory of my uncle on the day of his wake, a respected man among many, and greatly missed. RIP march 2012